Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Dumb questions definitely exist

Hello!!!!!
I shouted that. In my head. You can tell that I shouted it because I put lots of exclamation points at the end
Get it? 

Anyway...

"There is no such thing as a stupid question." 
I'm pretty sure every teacher I've ever had has made sure to begin a year or a semester with this very wrong statement. 
After working in a restaurant for 6 years, I can say with confidence that there are most definitely stupid questions and that people do not hesitate to ask them. 

This being July, the tourists are swarming to the restaurant like Yogi Bear to a pic-in-ic basket. I'm convinced that all tourists compete against one another to come up with the most absurd requests or the most unintelligent questions. 

Let me give you a little bit of an idea of what I've been hearing recently. 

A few weeks ago someone approached my sister and asked her, "Is your grilled tilapia baked or cooked?" Mary Catherine was sort of confused and very awkwardly answered, "I'm pretty sure the grilled tilapia is grilled.
The woman thanked her for her assistance and happily helped herself to a nice piece of the grilled fish.

Another customer with a nut allergy asked her server if the pistachio pudding contained nuts. After learning that the pistachio pudding did indeed contain a nut (pistachios), this customer proceeded to demand that we label the pistachio pudding with a note that says "nut included". 
In my opinion, this customer should probably talk with her doctor if she's living her life unaware of what pistachios are while harboring a nut allergy. 
I'm just saying. 

Just this evening a customer gave me an interesting order. 
"I'll have the mashed potatoes, hold the meat please." 
I looked at her and was trying to figure out what she meant, and she explained that she was a vegetarian and could have absolutely no meat. So I kind of tilted my head and hesitantly asked, "So that's a no on the gravy then as well?" 
"Right. Mashed potatoes with no meat and no gravy." 
We don't serve mashed potatoes with meat. Ever. 
She also wanted carrots and made sure I remembered not to put meat on those as well. 
No problem. 

Speaking of vegetarians- a woman a few weeks ago had me go over the menu with her to find vegetarian options since she could eat absolutely no meat. She finally decided to just do the buffet and stick with the salad and other veggie options. Literally 5 minutes after I walked away from her table I saw her at the buffet heaping beef tips onto her plate. As soon as she sat down, I went by her table not sure if I was going to have to explain to this vegetarian woman that beef tips are actually made of beef and therefore do not qualify as a "vegetarian option".
Imagine my shock as I realized there was not only beef tips, but numerous pieces of fried chicken making up the other half of her overflowing plate. 
I must have made a face [I was thinking she's a pretty different kind of vegetarian] because she smiled at me and simply said "It looked too good for me to walk away!
I responded, "...sorry?" 

Unfortunately, stupidity is [apparently] contagious and does not spare even the brightest of employees. 
Especially me. 

My conversation with a family of 4 yesterday as I was taking their order:
"So you're all doing the buffet?" -me
"Yes." -father
"Alright, so how old are you?"-me
"11" -eldest child
"And how old are you?" -me
"9" -youngest child
"And how old are you?" -me
"42!" -mother
"Oops."-me
Needless to say, I was so embarrassed. All 4 of them died laughing at me, and my face immediately went bright red. 
It was a rough night.

I find comfort in knowing that I'm not the only employee who struggles sometimes. 
A customer asked Mary Catherine where the bathrooms were. She replied, "Straight to the right." 
She apologized for the confusion after the man just stood there trying to figure out her directions. 
He did [thankfully] make it to the bathroom.

Other than that, life has been trucking right along.
Don't think that life is normal though. 
I keep finding little things that make me smile, just because they're kind of ridiculous. 

These crackers made me a bit nervous. I won't be serving any of them to Shasta. 


Speaking of Shasta- she's still our resident Drama Queen. 
Mary Catherine, Daddy and I all give her a run for her money though.
 

And my favorite- this little guy at Trailside gas station. 
Free air, hallelujah! 


It's the little things, really. 

I'm down to about 1 month of summer-time freedom. 
Kind of glad, kind of sad. 
Want to start a countdown? 
Maybe I will tomorrow. 

Keep asking stupid questions. They keep my world interesting. 
I love my job.
=)


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